I Engage my fingers in Typing Articles or Japa (09/24/09)
Yes, it sounds like you have ‘been thru the wringer’, so to speak. There are many bad things in this world and some of them pass in the name of Kṛṣṇa consciousness.
On the bright side of things, you can thank Kṛṣṇa that you have come in some connection to Śrīla Śrīdhara Mahārāja by reading his books and associating with his followers.
I have not heard that your good wife was interested much in our āśrama, and on top of that she/you are expecting a child. With that addition to your family, life gets even more complicated and responsibility
increases significantly — you can especially expect an increase in your financial responsibility as well as in other personal areas also. With all that coming your way fast, I don’t see how you can do any service to our mission, but you can certainly be and identify yourself as a community member even though you live in another country.
About that future which will be your reality within the year, you should start to think and prepare for that. You won’t have much time to spare, to go here and there and you will need a financial base — otherwise your life could go upside down — so you should get down to business and figure all that out ASAP.
But your solace is that you have discovered Śrīla Śrīdhara Mahārāja and his followers. You can continue to read, watch video lectures and correspond with the devotees. I recommend that you try to keep some
contact with M____ Mahārāja and G___ Mahārāja. They should be happy to answer your questions if you have any.
As for me, I do not have “email relationships” with our devotees. I only write emails as concern specific services that need my attention — other than that I devote my time on the keyboard to writing articles for Krsna Talk, or engage my fingers in japa.
Hoping this meets you well and hoping by the grace of Kṛṣṇa that you can sort things out at this stage of your life.