The Next Chilli is Going to Taste Sweet (11/27/12)
Yes it is okay to share with me some of the difficulties that you are going thru with _______.
Being separated for sometime might bring you back closer together, but frankly speaking you should be prepared that it may not improve and that more permanent steps might have to be taken. Unfortunate, but that is how many, many relationships turn out these days.
In any case, it is never good or proper for a man to be too attached to a woman. It is actually degrading. It is known since ancient times that association and attachment to women makes a man weak and is often the cause of his failure. As far as I have seen in life, not much has changed since ancient times except that men have become more and more dependent on women and this has become a cause of much suffering for everyone.
The persons to suffer the most in these situations are the children. It is especially difficult for the children when the parents fight for custody and try to turn the children against their other parent. This is very bad and you should diligently avoid such for the benefit of the children. If it comes to a showdown then it is better to let the mother have her way and to always be seen by the children as a loving and caring Dad, even if at a distance.
My opinion is based on what I have seen others have to go thru. I was never married and I learned early on that the so-called love relationships in the world were temporary at best and often ended in bitter feelings toward the person we once said we loved.
Old school thinking says that when a relationship utterly fails that then it is time to give it up. But in modern times people live by the motto, “If at first you don’t succeed try, try again.” In other words they think that although the first chilli they ate burned their tongue, the next chilli they eat is going to be sweet.
In times of difficulty a man should take shelter of his intelligence and the Holy Name of Kṛṣṇa. It is never advisable to take shelter of intoxication of any type to forget one’s sorrows.
Just some words of advice from the old swami in India.
Hoping you are well.
Your Spiritual Father,