My Heart is Only Disturbed (04/22/01)

My Heart is Only Disturbed (04/22/01)

Hare Kṛṣṇa.

I have read your email below and I am very sad to hear all these bad reports coming from you about the situation between yourself and some of the other devotees. ‘Sad’ is not the proper word – my heart is being torn into pieces. When I left for the States only a few weeks ago, I left behind a family of happy devotees. But in no time, Māyā Devī has entered and created such havoc that it is unbearable to hear all these things. Rather than know all these things. it may be better to live in ignorance. At least then my heart will be peaceful and I can chant the Holy Name of Kṛṣṇa attentively. But now my heart is only disturbed.

From what you say, the situation has now gone beyond the possibilities of reconciliation, at least that is, until I return to the āśrama. Since I am not returning to the āśrama for at least two more months, the only suggestion that I can give at this point is that you should just try to live peacefully with your family and not involve in fighting. As you have stated, Kṛṣṇa knows the truth. He knows who has done wrong and who has not.

At least if you are living at home in peace with your family you can chant, take prasadām with those you love, and focus on clearing your debt and other domestic problems.

My humble request at this time is that all these issues be dropped, and when I will return to the āśrama I will determine the necessity to look into all these matters. But from here I can do nothing but make this humble suggestion.

If you need to email me further please do not hesitate to do so. I am here always to try and help you.

My best wishes and blessings,

With Affection,

Swami B.G. Narasiṅgha